Getting Serious about Getting Married



Publisher CROSSWAY

ISBN 1-58134-741-3

“Rethinking the Gift of Singleness” is the subtitle of this thought provoking book.  At the time of writing the author was about thirty-five years old, maybe it could be have been improved by waiting a little longer, but then again, it may have lost some of its ‘fire’ and challenge.  All in all a vital read, not only for those who are single, but for pastors to re examine their doctrines of singleness.  She goes right to heart of things Biblically and brings the thoughts of men like Luther and Calvin to bear and the general attitude of the Reformers and the Puritans to the whole issue of marriage and singleness.   A book to be read for all single younger people and also for those who are older, particularly who have responsibility to care for and teach the word and ways of God to those younger in years.  Marriage is the fundamental design that God ordained for human beings.  Celibacy is for the celibate, not something that is the result of the cultural norms of our day with the erosion of responsibility that is manifested in so many young men as they evade marriage, in the USA in particular, they are prepared to ‘date’ girls without any serious intention of marriage.  Debbie Maken has some sound advice to give to young ladies as they run through the mill of the attitudes so prevalent among younger men.  Getting serious about getting married is what the book is all about.  The spurious and imbalanced teachings that have glutted church so much, the idea that the single are ‘free to serve the Lord’ and that there is a kind of aura about those who make such a choice is given a good scriptural hammering here.  The whole matter of marriage is an urgent issue facing churches today.  That young Christian women and men should pursue marriage has been something of a no go area.  To my knowledge there is no other book available that addresses these matters.  I wonder how the ideas expressed in the phrases, “I’m waiting on the Lord and trying to be content with my singleness,”  and, “the Lord has told me that you are to be my spouse,” became so prominent.  Did they have their origin in the ‘special words from the Lord” that has been part and parcel of the last fifty years in certain wings of the Christian church?  On the other hand, many who are thoroughly ‘word based’ as they say, avoid plain statements such as ‘be fruitful and multiply’ and the result is one or two children, “when it is convenient to have them and will not interfere with my career and our income.”  There is plenty to ponder, to challenge and to face for all of us in the pages of this book.  






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